Dinner at the McCullough's Home

Meals in Victorian times were more formal than they are today. It was very important to behave properly at the dinner table and to show that you knew all of the rules. For example, it was rude for a man to let butter or soup remain on his whiskers , or to let people see you remove disgusting things like hair or insects from your food. You were supposed to put them quietly on the edge of your plate. There were many other rules that you were expected to know, and many of them are still important today. You were supposed to sit up straight, put your napkin in your lap, and keep your hands under the table while you were waiting to be served. You were not supposed to have a serious conversation with the other people at the table, but talk about pleasant things like the book you were reading or the weather.

When Lizzie's great-grandson was little, he wasn't allowed to eat in the dining room. When he was finally big enough to be invited to eat with the grown ups, he was very excited. He got all dressed up and tried to use his very best manners at the table. However, that night they had beef for dinner, and it was hard to cut. When he tried, a piece of meat went flying off his plate into the flowers in the middle of the table. He was very embarrassed. But everybody at the table was very polite and pretended not to notice. What he remembered was the family's good manners.

Even though Lizzie didn't cook meals herself because she had a cook, she liked to plan what the family and their guests were going to eat. People ate many more courses in Victorian times than we do now-sometimes as many as eight or nine at a special dinner for important guests. If you had been a guest of the McCulloughs in 1891 when President Harrison stayed with them for two days and they gave one breakfast and two dinners in his honor, you would have been served soft shell crabs, fried chicken, and filet of beef all in the same meal. You also would have been served three desserts.

Because Lizzie and her daughters were very artistic, they often made beautiful invitations to invite friends to come to dinner. Sometimes they decorated the place cards used to show where people were supposed to sit at the dining room table. Ella was particularly talented and made beautiful place cards. If you had been the most important man invited to dinner at the McCulloughs, you would have offered your arm to Lizzie and escorted her into the dining room when dinner was served. You would have known to help Lizzie into her chair. If you had been the most important woman, John McCullough would have offered you his arm and escorted you in.

When dinner was over, gentlemen went into one room to smoke cigars and drink a sweet wine called port. The ladies remained in the dining room and talked among themselves. Everybody was expected to stay for at least an hour after dinner. It was rude to rush away.

Sometimes the McCulloughs and the Parks could be very informal. Their family friend, Charley Lincoln, who often stayed with them in North Bennington, wrote a letter to Lizzie in San Francisco to tell her what was happening at home:

Olive gives us splendid food. Your grandmother very seldom finds anything to criticize. We have the finest popcorn evenings. I never experienced anything like it before. Tip and both cats are fond of it. We sit in a row in the library and get very convivial over our popcorn most every evening.